I can now technically call myself a senior in high school. There is something powerful about that title. After all these years, we are finally on top; we finally run the school. However, it’s only the summer before my senior year begins and I already want it to be over. If I’m being honest, I’ve had the dreaded senioritis since I was a freshman. The moment I get into the building is the same moment I desire to get out.
School and I have never gotten together well. I haven’t really had to try extremely hard to do well in school. After eleven years of cruising on autopilot, I’m greatly burnt out and bored of school. I have recently learned that apathy can destroy any opportunity for growth.
In my mind, I may feel like high school is a waste of time because I already know what college I am going to attend and what I’ll most likely major in. But the reality is I am not prepared for college. I haven’t ever put forth a lot of effort into my education because it came easy to me. Eventually I’m going to hit a wall. And not like one of those plush, padded walls. No, this will be a solid cement wall and hitting it is going to hurt.
Everyone has a point where things start to get tough; a point where you have to actually apply yourself. For me, I started to reach that point at the end of my junior year. Studying, a foreign concept, was now something I had to do. In some aspects, I am so thankful that I hit this wall before my high school career is over. Imagine going into college with no study habits or academic effort to back your scores with. That is a frightening thought.
The last trimester of my junior year was a very trying time for me. Not only was I dealing with my own personal and family hardships, I had to also tackle my growing apathy towards school. I had a mindset of, well if I don’t understand it, that means I’m incompetent and I’ll never understand, so I just don’t care. And unfortunately my grades showed for that. The last two weeks I put the pedal to the metal and finished as strong as I could. But going through a month and a half period of an apathetic mindset and just not caring, really hurt me as a student.
There’s no doubt that the classes I signed up for in the fall are going to be challenging. If after this 3 month hiatus I still am apathetic, I’m in huge trouble. I need to realize that my senioritis cannot turn into not caring. I need to grow in my senior year; grow as a student and a human being.
I cannot wait until June 2016. For when it’s my turn to don a cap and gown, shake hands with my principal, grab my diploma and enter a new season of my life. And the anticipation for that day is killing me. But for now, I am going to strive to be the best I can be, and equip myself with enough tools to somehow survive a college lifestyle.
Side effects may include extreme apathy, excessive school skipping, slacking on schoolwork, and urges to obsess over graduation day.
There is no known cure.
It’s time to discover a cure for myself.
Your Adventures Await…Go Forth And Conquer!